times grueling tribulation that comes through santification, we have not one single ounce of fear of Whom we belong to and where we are going. There is no fear in our salvation, our works, our rewards, or anything that may await us in heaven, and there is no fear of man and what he might do to us. We know there is nothing we can do to earn anything! We know He is the only one who can perfect us and prepare us, and we willingly LET HIM DO IT in great praise and thanksgiving through His Spirit. We are at total rest in His peace... that completeness and rest that produces a humble confidence (immovable assurance) that the Word speaks of... According to the eternal purpose which he purposed in Christ Jesus our Lord: in whom we have boldness and access with confidence by the faith of him. Ephesians 3:11-12 Herein is our love made perfect, that we may have boldness [confidence] in the day of judgment: because as he is, so are we in this world. 1 John 4:17 Let us therefore come boldly [confidently] unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:16 Do you ever ponder that "confidence" and what that really feels like -- to have a consistent, immovable assurance in His love for you that you can confidently approach Him and rest in Him, even when you have failed miserably or things are falling apart around you? I've begun to get a taste of it again, more consistently and assuredly. I am finding myself in His rest and peace more and more. And while I can write about what it's like to be perfected in His love, I can honestly say that I am still working towards this; there was much damage to overcome. Many of us do not realize the level of damage that results when false doctrine takes root. False doctrine can kill if it is not exposed, confessed, and uprooted. It is only by His grace that that's exactly what has happened with me! My storyAt this point, it is only His Spirit that can articulate this perfect love to me and begin to restore me. I am fully aware of what it looks like, and that all I have experienced in this regard is simply a means to an end. To think of where I was and where He has taken me now... I am completely overwhelmed with gratitude. Only I know how lost and dead I felt... unloved and set aside by the One I was so in love with because of what He did for me. It was horrible. But now... the night has passed and the Light has come! There is something I must share about this, and it will tie dircectly to what I share about Leah below. Only as I was speaking it to my dear friend this morning did I realize that my story was somewhat like Leah's. Obviously, it brought tears, awe, and much gratitude. I pray this blesses you! During the time that I experienced the perceived "rejection" of the Father and His Son, I was repeatedly reminded of things that were very condemning to my race of people, both by people I knew and things I would read. I was personally told that although I loved the Father, this did not mean He loved me, and that the nations were not His choice. I was told that the Bible was a Hebrew book -- by Hebrews, for Hebrews, and about Hebrews -- and no one else. I was told that we (the Gentiles, particularly white people) stole the book and applied it to ourselves and were living a lie. I was told that my salvation experience was a superficial "Christian" experience based on the "faulty love doctrine". I was basically told that salvation was for them and that what awaited me (and my people) was either hell or slavery, if we happened to make it to the kingdom. I did realize that much of what was being spoken to me was coming out of pain, but I also realized it was coming out of pride. Ultimately I knew it was all a lie -- but that was after the damage was done. I do not share this so you can feel sorry for me. I have responsiblity in this too; I received it... for a time. However, I was not so weak in my faith that I would believe just anything. My vulnerability came from what I had learned about the horrible racial division and abuse that had taken place in the past, and it had literally broken me. In addition to that, just prior to this I had suffered great tragedy in my family, and I was full of fear and grief and depression. As I mentioned in the post before, I was a sitting duck... the perfect target. This very extreme false doctrine, along with my fragile and broken state of mind at the time, devastated me... to the point that I had no idea why I was alive. How could I have been saved and transformed in such an amazing, supernatural way, just to have the Lord and God who did this miracle reject me? Was my purpose to suffer in this life knowing that He did not love me as a "punishment" for what "my people" had done to others? It was more than I could bear, and these things were continually spoken to me and over me -- and all by someone I dearly love and respected and trusted. I share all of this to say this one very important thing... Although I was extremely broken, very sad and depressed, greatly lacking faith in His love for me, and barely functioning... I NEVER turned from Him. I never stopped seeking Him, seeking holiness with all my heart, and I never stopped loving and obeying Him to the best of my ability. There was no way; I simply could not leave Him, even if He rejected me. I stayed the course, and I endured... by His grace and my true love for Him. I believe this was the sole reason that I overcame. I endured and overcame by LOVE! Through all of that, His steadfast, everlasting love was still IN ME, and therefore, I still loved Him -- even if He was to condemn me. His love brought life back to a very dead soul. I was dead, and I felt every ounce of it. But the story does not end there!! I claim now and forever with all confidence and thanksgiving... I AM ALIVE, I AM LOVED, AND I AM HIS! The "loved" brideOne day, I was pondering and writing how a bride feels when she is about to marry the love of her life... when all is pure and done right, and the two are coming together in total trust and submission to one another - with the Heavenly Father being the author and keeper of the union. I thought of her thoughts, ways, and attitudes towards her beloved soon-to-be husband. Then as I thought more about these, I asked myself if this is the way I feel now about my Beloved, soon-to-be Husband... Yahusha/Jesus. As you read these attributes of a bride, take it in and ask yourself also...
Philadelpha & LeahJust as the "unloved" bride could be somewhat connected with Ephesus and Leah, so too the "loved" bride can be connected with the church of Philadelphia and Leah (again). First, we all know that Philadelphia was one of the two churches for which Yahusha/Jesus had no correction, only praise. It is the church of Philadelpha, however, that is the one where love is a focus. As most know, the name "Philadelphia" means "brotherly love". Well, my thought is that we cannot have true brotherly love as our Savior explained to us (willing to lay our lives down for our brother) without His love fully received by us and operating in and through us. This church had it right and had her eyes directed in the right place. This church was a "loved" bride even by her own perception. She is so in His will and ready for Him that He says He is going to give her the name of His God, the name of the holy city of His God, and His own new name. As His bride, she will be taking His name! As I think of her, I think of all those things written in purple above about the bride who was resting in the love of her beloved and only focusing on him and making herself ready for him - she knew His love. In thinking of this Bride of Philadelphia and how He will give her His name, it reminds me of Psalm 45:10-11: Hearken, O daughter, and consider, and incline thine ear; forget also thine own people, and thy father's house; so shall the king greatly desire thy beauty: for he is thy Lord; and worship thou him. As His "loved" Bride, we are to "forget" in a sense our families and even our father's house, which represents our earthy identity, and we are to go through the open door to His tabernacle He has set before us, and we reside there with Him. We take His name, His identity, and His image. We are one with Him... we are a "loved" Bride through and through. And to Leah once again... In the first part of this post, she was the eptiome of the "unloved" bride. There is no doubt that Leah suffered and likely for a very long time. She loved Jacob with all of her heart, and I believe she wanted to be to him all that is written in purple above (and then some, as I can only express in part). But the fact remains that she was always the second choice. It certainly reminds me of the pain I went through in my time of rejection, so I can have some idea even spiritually. However, the story does not end here with Leah. As we know, Rachel passed away quite early in her life after giving birth to Benjamin. This left Leah as the only true bride amongst two handmaidens. The Word says that Leah was "tender-eyed", and this means that she was delicate, timid, and spoke words gently; she was a tender soul. Seveal years ago, I read something in the Book of Jubilees about Leah that blessed me so much. As I was pondering all of the parts of this post, I was reminded of what I read. This book shared some very beautiful things about Leah in the context of her death and how Jacob handled it. I would like to share it exactly as it is written in the book so that you can receive the full blessing. And Leah his wife died in the fourth year of the second week of the forth-fifth jubilee, and he buried her in the double cave near Rebecca his mother, to the left of the grave of Sarah, his father's mother. And all her sons and his sons came to mourn over Leah his wife with him, and to comfort him regarding her, for he was lamenting her. For he loved her exceedigly after Rachel her sister died; for she was perfect and upright in all her ways and honoured Jacob, and all the days that she lived with him he did not hear from her mouth a harsh word, for she was gentle and peaceable and upright and honourable. And he remmeberd all her deeds which she had done during her life, and he lamented her exceedingly; for he loved her with all his heart and with all his soul." Jubilees 36:21-24 Although Leah was initially "unloved", her unending love for Jacob caused her to overcome and endure all the suffering that came with feelings of rejection and being the lesser of Jacob's two wives. Leah obviously loved Jacob with the love of God that was in her. Leah was the epitome of a pure bride and virtous woman, and her ability to consistently and enduringly love in thought, deed, and words brought about an "exceeding love in both heart and soul" for her by Jacob whereby he would neve forget all her good deeds she had done in her life. She never turned from Jacob in the midst of rejection and pain; she continued to love and seek to be his perfect bride. She endured by and through love and became a "loved" bride! Before moving on from this section, I feel it necessary to share all of the favor that was poured out upon Leah in her life, clearly displaying the love of the Father for her and in her.
ConclusionIn His love, we are all called to endure till the end. Without fully receiving the love of our Heavenly Father, through His precious Son Yahusha/Jesus the Messiah, we cannot and will not operate in that love as we should. I believe that it is highly possible that in this state, we will remain an "unloved" bride, as this will be our perception -- our belief -- our reality. On the contrary, however, there is nothing more sure or more steadfast or more unchanging or more perfect than the love our King and Father has for us - NOTHING! It is now past time that we believe Him and live in the utter joy and peace and strength of this love. We simply will not survive what is coming without it. I end this with the words of Paul as he described the assurance of this love... Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:37-39
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Special NoteThese writings are written in love and a spirit of servitude. They are not designed to judge but make us think. We are all sinners in need of saving, and we all need encouragement and absolute truth to endure on the narrow road to sanctification and ultimately eternal life. Categories
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